Establish a Successful Support Structure
Jill has a 3rd-grade son and a 6th-grade daughter, now in middle school. Last spring, Jill was overwhelmed with the chaos of baseball games, violin practice, homework struggles, and spring gardening. She wants her family to experience more fun and peace this year.
Discussion
Does this sound like your home? You’re not alone. Nearly all parents struggle with juggling family activities and fitting in time for homework. Academic success doesn’t come naturally to everyone, even for the brightest of students. Some kids find it very challenging to be organized, pay attention when they need to, get homework done, and avoid the attitude that “it’s not cool to do school.” It’s never too late no matter what month of the school year you’re reading this to set up a support system for success in school.
My friend, Sue Wellman, a teacher and founder of The Ophelia Project, and I share these tips to help parents create a good study environment at home:
- Choose a good study site where the whole family can be together rather than having children work alone in their rooms.
- Create a “distraction-free” zone during study times.
- If your child needs background noise to study—turn the radio on low volume. Turn off the phone so they don’t even hear it ring. Turn cell phones off and put them elsewhere to remove texting possibilities. If your child does homework on the computer, set it to “work offline” so there is not a temptation to browse the Internet or IM (Instant Message) friends.
- Make this a time when everyone in the family is studying or reading. Reading together as a family is one of the best ways to encourage the activity.
- Use one calendar to keep track of all activities. Add homework time on the schedule. Post this calendar where everyone can see what the plan is for each day.
- Create an aura in your home where learning is “what we do in our family,” just like “we use napkins instead of our sleeves” or “we listen when someone has a concern.”
- At dinnertime, make it a ritual for everyone in the family to share one thing new they learned that day and one thing they don’t yet understand.
- Make “learning”–not “homework”–the task. Proactively create family mantras about school, studying and learning:
- We are learners and readers.
- School is an opportunity to learn.
- Learning is a life-long adventure and it is fun!
- It’s perfectly OK to make mistakes or not learn something right away.
- Each time you will do a little better.
- It’s not your grade that counts.
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If I knew then what I know now, I would have …
Saved time and reduced stress in the long run by investing attention in
setting up a system for homework that worked for everyone.
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With admiration for all you do,
Dr. Kathy
Kathy Masarie, MD
Pediatrician, Parent, and Life Coach
Author of the Parenting Guides Raising Our Daughters and Raising Our Sons
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